In career guidance sessions at school, my daughter was presented with a variety of career choices. Airline hostess, beautician, librarian, chemist, veterinary nurse, to name but a few. All very worthwhile, satisfying, demanding jobs, endowing the people who do these jobs in society with a certain degree of status and financial reward.
But nowhere in the vast amount of literature available to her, or in the choices presented to her by the staff, was there mention of being a wife and mother. A worthwhile job? Certainly. Satisfying and demanding? Without doubt. But a problem arises when you think of the status attached to this role in today's society. ... Virtually nil? It isn't paid work, and therefore commands little overall respect in a society of economic values.
With effective birth control, women usually make an informed choice to have children. So why can't they be seen as making a positive, informed choice to be housewives? Women are assumed (particularly by Feminist writers) to want to be out in the workplace. Even the government encourages new mothers to get back out to work as soon as possible. The New Deal for Lone Parents made single mothers part of the 'welfare to work' scheme, taking away their automatic right to choose to stay at home and bring up their family. Is this a good state of affairs?
If some women get fulfilment out of the domestic role, why should they be made to feel less worthy? Feminists argue that housework is repetitive, dull, monotonous and unfulfilling. Maybe it is, but so are the unskilled manual or clerical jobs where most women find themselves. At least in your own home you are autonomous, able to make your own decisions about how things are done.
Career women argue that 'stay at home mothers' are missing out, but women choosing that lifestyle see others' attitudes as the problem.
In fighting for women's rights to work after the last war, feminists claimed to be speaking for all women. If women want this right, fair enough. But they should also have the right to choose not to compete in a man's world.
Women who choose to devote their lives to being wives and mothers provide a secure home for their family and emotional support. This is therefore a valuable social role, especially in today's society of falling standards of behaviour amongst the young. It is not a modern viewpoint, but maybe if more mothers chose to devote their lives to producing well-balanced, and disciplined citizens for the future, our streets would be nicer places. Working mothers are often blamed for juvenile delinquency and emotionally disturbed children. Mothers always have the responsibility and blame if things go wrong, but are made to feel 'less worthy' if they choose to devote themselves fully to looking after the family. ... Surely a contradictory message?
Stay at home mothers also provide a valuable support base for the husbands. Today's workplace is highly stressful, and men need the day to day stressors taken off their shoulders if they're not to go under from the strain of modern living.
Of course it can be argued that stay at home women are totally financially dependent on their husbands, but this isn't necessarily true, as today's state benefits such as family allowance and child tax credit are paid directly to the mother.
Maybe we should begin to educate the young girls in our society that to choose a non-waged domestic labour career path can be seen as a rational choice.
The burn your bra brigade have got a lot to answer for!
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